May 27
It’s Not Failure, It’s Growth
No matter what, you’ve learned something new…if you choose to
If something doesn’t go as planned, if something doesn’t come easy to me, I am a failure or I wasn’t meant to do it. I shouldn’t be doing it anyway. Why did I even bother trying?
That was my mindset. That’s what Carol Dweck, author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, calls the “fixed mindset”. It’s one so many of us are trapped in and don’t realize. It prevents us from trying again and/or trying harder.
What if reframing the missteps could generate amazing results in your life? That question isn’t rhetorical, it actually can. Here’s what that looks like from one of my own personal experiences.
I was a serial entrepreneur. I chuckle to myself as I write that because usually when you hear that, you envision someone successfully running multiple businesses. Me, I started and quit 5 businesses before I found the one that “felt right”.
That was not an overnight process. Time and money were invested in all those ventures. At the time it felt as though I was failing. There was a lot of questioning myself, my worth, my intelligence, my sanity. When you don’t have support from those around you, it makes those questions even louder. While I didn’t have anyone telling me to give up, I also didn’t have anyone saying, try again, keep going, or have you considered…
In truth, I “failed” those businesses because I was afraid of failing at those businesses. If you recall, earlier I mentioned that a fixed mindset can prevent you from trying harder while making it feel like you’re trying. It’s a trick. It’s an easy out… “I tried, it just didn’t work”. Instead of going all in and allowing the process to unfold the way it’s supposed to, I just dipped my foot in and allowed the water to go up to my calf before I bowed out.
Failure is part of the process of success. In my mind, however, it was an indication that I wasn’t cut out for what I was trying to do. I wasn’t good enough, not smart enough. I could keep going but you get the point. So if I didn’t fully do it, I didn’t prove any of those thoughts correct.
All that said, let’s reframe what missteps actually are. They are F.A.I.L.U.R.E., not failure. I decided to make it into a mnemonic and use it as a booster when I felt like I was stepping down instead of up.
F.A.I.L.U.R.E. is 👇🏽
Fear of failure affects people in different ways. Whether it’s mild or severe, it has the ability to stop you from seeing something through. I won’t go into the psychology of when it possibly started (clears throat, elementary school, or earlier). The beauty is, we all have the same power. We have the power to choose our perspective. We have the power to decide to reprogram our minds.
Staying stuck is not an option for me and I hope not for you either.
We can choose F.A.I.L.U.R.E. or failure.
Which do you choose? And what step will you take next now that you’ve made that choice?
Thank you for reading
